Therapy 101: Cognitive Activities—Make them think!

What happens at therapy? Is it just some games? Or hands-on activity to get the child the think? Surely you can do that at home? Do you really need a therapist to do that?

 

These are some questions that are thrown to me when people find out that Nadine goes for therapy. I know they mean well, and I appreciate that. Just to answer the questions:

 

Sometime therapy happens behind closed doors. I’m sitting at the reception area, and I can hear the session, but can’t see what’s happening. I can hear Nadine squealing in delight sometimes when she gets excited, or I can hear her frustration when she’s made to repeat certain phrases that’s difficult for her (e.g. words that start with L and Y). I get to find out what happened in that one hour, only after the session, when the therapist does her end of lesson summary with me.

 

The following is my (and Nadine’s) favourite activity:

 

It’s really fun and you can try it too! Each shape represents an activity. Your child has to remember, in this case, Square: JUMP, Triangle: KICK, Circle: CLAP & Star: STAR JUMP.

 

Round 1: You draw out various sequences on a paper. As you point to it, your child does the sequence. This is the simplest portion. Keep it to 3-4 actions per sequence

 

Round 2: You do a sequence of action, and your child will draw out the correct sequence. (you can see the part that she drew vs the part the therapist did!)

 

There are various adaptations that you can do. Generally, the child gets to do crazy actions and at the same time, hone her skills to remember cognitively and sort out her thoughts.

 

For Nadine, this was very effective. In her jumbled up brain, she has a mish-mash of information that is not sorted out. This activity helps her think through in a fun way, and teaches her basic categorisation.

 

So since I can do this at home, why does she still need therapy? Cos this is one of the many many activities she does during her session. Cos I can do this activity, but I couldn’t possibly come up with it. Cos even if this activity is found in Therapy activity books, I wouldn’t have known what level of difficulty I should pitch it at. Bottomline, unless I’m trained in childhood development and therapy, it would be really unfair to Nadine if I am her only source to help her through her developmental journey.

 

Do you have a favourite interesting activity that helps a child’s cognitive skills? I would love to hear them! Leave me a comment if you are have and if there is sufficient contributors, I will start a linky to share our resources! I will share more in my future posts!

 

Leaving you with a picture of Nadine recently, co-ordinating her hands! She had a blast!

 

This is part of a series I’ve started – Therapy 101, to document Nadine’s developmental struggles and victories, and to journal my own learning experiences as she goes through hers.

 

 

 

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Therapy 101: The Dance Performance

I’ve received some lovely emails and comments about Nadine and I thought should do one post that made me a super proud mummy.

Well, Nadine, with all her therapy sessions have improved tremendously. And here’s a short video of her performing during the school’s Chinese New Year concert. Check out her smile and her enthusiasm!

Can you see her very much improved co-ordination? Her deep concentration to get the steps right? Her attempt to make the entire dance look natural? (I thought the dance steps were a wee bit challenging for a 5 yr old!) And can you see her trying hard to keep smiling throughout? (probably the teacher’s very important instruction to the class!)

So with such little milestones, we just keep giving thanks. Every bit is an improvement, every bit is a testament to God’s faithfulness!

This is part of a series I’ve started – Therapy 101, to document Nadine’s developmental struggles and victories, and to journal my own learning experiences as she goes through hers.

Linking with:

 

           

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Wave Goodbye!

There’s this thing about waving bye bye to your child.

It starts when the child can barely speak. I’m not sure why this is one of the very first milestones we expect of our kids. Mind you, it’s not just “WAVE at mummy!” it’s a “Wave BYE BYE!” Poor kid, after achieving this, we actually go off! (maybe to work, maybe to run an errand.. but definitely not hang around!)

Now that my kids are up and about and going to school, we hardly get a wave. Thank God I still get to kiss them goodbye, but to get a wave? Here’s what I got today!

I realised when the wave is from a further distance, the enthusiasm increases. e.g. waving from a moving vehicle, or waving beyond a glass panel or door. I hate goodbyes, and I think kids too!

Do your kids still wave goodbye? Or do you?

 

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Therapy 101: Ask a question and wait

It’s been a while since I’ve blogged about Nadine’s Therapy sessions. In my last post, I mentioned that she has low muscle tone, and her weekly Gym sessions does wonders on her.

Another area that Nadine has to work on is her speech and language development. After assessment, she has delayed language skills and delayed cognitive skills. One of the issues is for Nadine to answer WHAT questions. This includes “WHAT do you want for lunch?” “WHAT is that animal?” “WHAT toy would you like?” “WHAT is your teacher’s name?” 

For example, if we are at the zoo and we point out the zebras to her. She needs to a lot of time to find the right word for that animal. You see, she had a whole chunk of vocabulary in her mind, but it’s all mixed up!

Many of us have a filing system in our mind. Animals, Food, Colours, People, Things that move etc. For Nadine, everything is mumbo jumbo in her brain. She knows what is a zebra, she knows what is a strawberry, she knows what is a slipper, but all these words are mixed up to her. When we point out a zebra to her, she has to go through all these words in her mind, and match them correctly. As there is no filing system in her, she has to go through a banana/snowman/fish/purple/finger/barbie before she finds the word ZEBRA.

Over time, (before therapy started), she stopped trying. It took too long, took too much effort. Often, she bursts into tears, we give up and just tell her point blank, “It’s a Zebra”. I mean, it’s a zebra, the sun is shining, it is hot, we are impatient. ok. sometimes we help her by asking “Is it an elephant?” “Is it a giraffe?” Or most of the time, Nicole and Nathan would have shouted out ZEBRA! And we think that by jumping in the answer, we are helping. After all, who doesn’t know that black and white striped animals are zebras? Clearly this made her less confident and less willing to try.

But thank God for the therapy sessions. We understand what’s happening, and she built her confidence in her conversations. She can reply much quicker now and she is learning to “file” words in her brain.  In the past, she would just go “I don’t know” after thinking for a few seconds. Now, she spends a little more time, as she has the confidence to answer, and answers correctly! (9 out of 10 times, her first answer is correct. She just needs a bit more time and encouragement)

Now Nicole and Nathan know that when we ask Nadine questions, she has to try and answer them herself. And no one is allowed to say things like “Easy Peasy” or “I know I know”. Every one has a turn at answering questions. We also told grandparents, aunties, uncles and friends around. This helped as they too, learn to ask, and wait.

So now when you spend time with our family, you will see sometimes we are all just looking at Nadine, smiling. You see, my little girl is thinking.

This is part of a series I’ve started – Therapy 101, to document Nadine’s developmental struggles and victories, and to journal my own learning experiences as she goes through hers.

 

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When I grow up …

At the start of the year, I always ask my kids, “What do you wanna be when you grow up?”

Each year, the list has new additions, and sometimes, old dreams as tossed aside. This is the first start of the year this blog is going through, so here’s 2013’s WHAT I WANNA BE WHEN I GROW UP (with reasons stated in italics)

Nicole, 8 year old

• Nurse – To help others and I want to take temperature for the patients
• Teacher – I can teach, use the markers, and choose what books to read
• Hip-hop Dancer – Not ballet, so boring
• Scientist – I want to do experiments

Nathan, 6 year old

• Magician – I get to do magic tricks, and people have to pay me to do, and I get to travel and perform
• Policeman – I want to catch all the bad guys

Nadine, 5 year old

• Ballerina – I want to wear pink and purple

So in 2013, we are getting friends with occupations to speak to them so they can find out more. And in cases like magician, scientist and hip hop dancer, perhaps we will get the introduction kit/class for them.

What do your school going kids wanna be when they grow up?

 

 

 

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Candlelight Service: How Great Thou Art

Christmas. Time to love & give. Time to celebrate the birth of Christ. Time to be the light of the world.

We had our annual Candlelight Service in church last weekend. It was beautiful as we also celebrated God’s goodness, faithfulness and grace.

Strangely the song I’m reminded of this season ain’t a Christmas carol, but an old hymn:

O Lord my God

When I in awesome wonder

Consider all the worlds Thy hands hath made

I see the stars, I hear the roaring thunder

Thy power throughout

The universe displayed

Then sings my soul

My Saviour, God, to Thee

How Great Thou Art, How Great Thou Art

Thought I’ll leave you with Sandi Patty’s rendition of this hymn. Have a Blessed Christmas this season!

 

Grew up listening to her!

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Happy Kids, Happy Parents

Ice cream. It appeals more on a rainy day. It appeals even more after a full and satisfying meal.

We were at Bugis+ (previously known as Illuma) and GELATERIA ITALIA was shouting as us. And, it wasn’t just us who heard the voice! hahaha… So we had a dose (three doses to be exact) of Gelato.

I like to think that calories in Snickers-flavoured Gelato, Deep Chocolate-flavoured Gelato and Hazelnut Cream-flavoured Gelato burns faster than regular plain ones. The deception goes deeper as I figured if I type out every flavour, the calories will all burn off! Ohhh and if we call it gelato, isn’t it healthier?

End result? Happy kids, happy parents!

 

 

 

 

 

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Guest Post at The Gingerbread Mum

Today, we are guests at The Gingerbread Mum, and I had the opportunity to think about the year 2012 and how thankful I am for what has happened. Adora is doing a daily series showcasing what different parents are thankful for in 2012.

Drop by to read about my year here.

 

 

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Love Talk with Kids

Have I told you lately that I love you?

Every night, part of my goodnight ritual is to tell the kids “I Love You” The usual response is “I Love You mummy” or “I Love You too mummy”.

Last week, I asked them why? Why do you love Mummy? haha I don’t expect some philosophical answer or a long list of what I did right. It was just one of those, “I just wanna know” questions.  

Here’s their response: (all asked separately!)

Nicole, 7yo – I love you because you buy food for us, and you bring me out

Nathan, 5yo – I don’t know. I love you. Don’t ask me. I don’t know.

Nadine, 4yo – I love you because mumble mumble (she mumbled and I couldn’t hear her answer!)

My conclusion? Girls do talk more. They think more. They can answer questions even if they mumble! For boys, just be happy they said I love you.

 

What do your kids say when you ask the ‘Why Do You Love Mummy’ question?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Children. Love. Reading.

I love reading. Since young, when the forms ask for my hobbies, reading would be word I’ll put in. During recess, I’m happy to go to a quiet corner to read. I’m definitely not one of those playing catching in the field, or worse, playing basketball on the courts. Give me a book any day, and I’ll be happy.

Naturally, one of my greatest desires is for ALL my kids to love reading! Problem is, their genes also include a non-reader. You see, Daddy doesn’t read. He thinks it’s a big joke when he found out how I spent my recesses. He’s shocked that I prefer reading to watching that violent war movie on TV. He can’t believe that one simple story has to be told in three thick books. (To be fair, he does read non-fiction, and quite a bit of it too—Newspapers, News Magazines, Christian Books/Magazines. But how can one be called a reader if you don’t read fiction????)

So I do my part. I read to the kids daily regularly. Use every possible voice and pitch I have to be old witches, crying rabbits, hungry giants etc. Daddy reads to them too. It’s fun, but he uses his non-fiction/current affairs reading voice to them. (I don’t think there are talking squirrels and rhyming words in that department)

Imagine my smile when a friend sent me pictures of how enthusiastic my kids were when they stepped in a book fair recently. She said in the end, there were three baskets full. woooohooooo! Looks like my kids love reading too!!! yeah!!!

Yup, I pray that they continue to love reading. And if they love reading Mandarin too, it would be a miracle!

Do your children love reading?

 

 

 

 

 

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GIVEAWAY: Ashputtel-The Story of Cinderella

We went to the theatre on Saturday to watch <Ashputtel-the story of Cinderella> by I Theatre.  Honestly, I was a little nervous bringing them alone. Actually, I was nervous bringing Nathan! When I told him we’re watching Ashputtel, his first reaction? “HUH? What is that?”

There’s something about boys. They look like they don’t care, but they do very much actually, more so than girls some times!

I said, “it’s about Cinderella… Not the one that we always hear about, it’s a new story about Cinderella.” Sigh. you can imagine his response! “Ewww… Cinderella? I don’t like Cinderella!” But the girls overheard and it was “Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!”

Can you spot the boy? He really didn’t want to be in the photo

So it was, pre-show pictures clearly clearly displayed his excitement for the show. (You can see the girls and THEIR excitement!)

How was the show then?

It was one of the best adaptation of Cinderella I saw! It was simplified to something easy for the kids to digest (imagine Ashputtel had to carry shopping bags for her stepsisters!), the music was easy to hum along, the humour was great (Nicole cackled through some parts!) and although there were not much opportunity for audience interaction, the little that the cast did went extremely well with the kids!

Here are the reviewers’ comments: (Warning: Spoilers ahead!)

I will ask Marissa, Sarah, Janelle, Ally, Pei Ling, Denise, Shania, Jewel, Danielle to watch. It is very very very funny. Ashputtel is very pretty, I like her very much. The show is a little bit sad, and it is very very funny. I also like all the songs. And the stepmother is so rude, why is she so  rude?  Nicole Tay, 7 years old

I like it when one sister chopped off her toe and the other chopped off her heel. What is a heel, Mummy? I like the part when the prince asked all of us to help. I don’t have anything else to say. Nathan Tay, 5 years old

I like the birds, I like the dancing, I like Ashputtel. Nadine Tay, 4 years old

Would I recommend this show? Yes! Especially if you have daughters. Every girl should watch this. I didn’t find it childish or kiddy, and the kids didn’t find it adult-like or boring. I guess the classic love story with a Prince (and a good looking one here!) always works! For the boys, Yes, too! You see, officially, Nathan had little comments. Unofficially, he laughed and participated during the show. His morbid comments showed the ‘boyness’ in him to discredit all things girl-related.

Stepsister 1, Stepsister 2, Stepmother, Ashputtel’s Mother/bird, Ashputtel, Handsome Prince, Butler

Ashputtel-The Story of Cinderella is showing at Alliance Francaise Theatre from now till 17 Nov 2012. Tickets are available from SISTIC. You can find more details here.

And for my readers, I have two pairs of tickets to giveaway for the 11 Nov (Sun) 11.30 am show. Woohooo! Wanna win the tickets? Look no further!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

DISCLAIMER: This giveaway is in NO way sponsored, endorsed or administered by, or associated with Facebook. Information collected is NOT collected by Facebook. By signing up for this promotion, participants release and indemnify Facebook from all liabilities.

UPDATE

List Randomizer

There were 11 items in your list. Here they are in random order:

1. Dominique Goh
2. Angeline Sim

Congratulations to Dominique Goh & Angeline Sim for winning the two pairs of tickets! i Theatre will be contacting you about your tickets. Enjoy the show!

 

 

 

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Therapy 101–So What Is Wrong?

One of the questions that come my way about Nadine is “What is wrong with her?” Sometimes it is phrased in more politically correct way, “What happened?”. Nonetheless, many want to know why is she different.

Is she autistic? Is it Dyslexia? ADHD? Asperger? What is it?

Well, this is what her therapist put in her report:

Nadine is found to have delayed speech and language development. Her language skills were found to be moderately delayed. It was also noted that Nadine has motor coordination difficulties. She was subsequently referred to our Physiotherapist for an evaluation…was assessed to have delayed motor skills development.

The therapist explained that motor skills development is closely linked to a child’s speech and language. I thought it would be good to list out some challenges that Nadine faced with her physical motor skills:

• She hardly crawled, or rather, her crawling period was really short. She went straight to cruising.
• When she was 3.5 year old, she still has to hold the railing while walking down the stairs. And even then, both legs had to land on each step has she walked down.
• She only learnt to jump when she turned 4.
• When she walked, it always looked unstable. It was as if she may fall or trip soon.

There are probably other signs but we didn’t take note or didn’t realise we had to be concerned. One big factor was she had low muscle tone. She has floppy limbs and loose muscles. That’s characterised by problems with mobility and posture and poor reflexes. She has poor trunk support, which means she has trouble holding her body upright. This affects her speech and cognitive skills.

Gosh! When we found out, my first thought was, is it genetic? Was it because of something I ate when pregnant? Was it something we didn’t do when she was a baby? It was a barrage of thoughts that came. (For the record, it’s none of the above. It’s just something she’s born with)

One of the important therapy she has to go for now is Physiotherapy, which would work those muscles, strengthen the limbs and give her a greater sense of balance. Along with Physio, she attends GYM classes twice a week.  The work out is necessary to improve motor control and body strength. Check out the gym!

Isn’t it massive? Nadine has a blast in this old school gym! It’s not expensive (about S$20 for 1.5hours) and she gets to do forward roll, cartwheels and work on all these wonderful gym equipment!

In the end, we sent Nathan for gym too! We figured that bit of exercise won’t hurt, since our family is on the high inertia side! Nicole is in a different league as (in her own words), “I’m in the school Gymnastics team already!”

Does the Physiotherapy and Gymnastics help? Definitely. Over the last month, the gym was closed for renovation. And during the regular therapy sessions, Nadine has issues concentrating and focusing. We all can’t wait for Gym to start again. Cos when she was in it, she had a chance to tone her muscles and work on her balance. This invariably helps her to co-ordinate, and builds her cognitive skills (more on that in my future post).

We are going more daily exercises now: Hop on one leg 10x per leg, balance on one leg for as long as you can, sit-ups, play catching in the pool—get her to catch us via ‘running’. We pale in comparison to those gym instructors.. haha! But really anything is better than no exercise at all!

So what’s wrong with my baby? Simply put, she has low muscle tone. It can be a lifelong condition, but with physical exercises, the muscle tone can strengthen and improve over time. That’s what the books and therapists say. What do I say? I say she will get better, she is getting better and I have faith to believe her muscles are toning up each day. I have nothing to lose but everything to gain when I believe for this miracle. My God reigns, in every situation.

 

 

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Meanie Mummy

I’m a Meanie Mummy.

Yes, I stick by my guns and there are no favourites in the family. The consequences of misbehaving, whining, and being rude are spelt out clearly in our family. We don’t spare the rod, we don’t mince our words, and we have three different naughty corners in the house for each child.

This is what happens when a child misbehaves:

• The child is immediately pulled aside and given first warning. The warning consists of  a “don’t do that” plus a “if you continue, this will happen”
• If the child continue misbehaving, second warning comes out, usually louder and sterner.
• If it continues, there’s no third warning. Dependant on the nature of the misbehaviour, or what was said in first warning, punishment is rolled out, the child pays the consequence.
• Punishment also includes standing in a corner alone for one cycle to reflect. One cycle is the number of minutes to their age. So Nicole gets 7 min, Nathan 5 min, Nadine 4 min.

Of course all the above are done in the comfort of home, within the sound-proof walls of the house. If the misbehaviour happens when we are out, the warnings are usually quiet, stern, and as I mentioned before here, with my BIG BIG eyes.

I have three kids. So the One-For-All and All-for-One rule is big in our family. That’s really the best way, since much of their misbehaviour are shared by three! Is it inconvenient? Yeah, you bet. If I’m Meanie Mummy, daddy is Dictator Daddy. There’s no good guy and bad guy in parenting. We’re in it together, so the kids know, once they are caught, there’s no way out.

After all that, each child has to say sorry, and tell us why he/she is sorry. If they can’t tell why, it’s the naughty/quiet/reflective corner again for the next cycle.

Then comes the hugs and the kisses. The assurance of love and why we do what we did.

The challenge the Meanie Mummy faces is to think of a punishment that fits the misbehaviour when we are outside. As they grow older, it usually is a consequence—taking away a privilege, or something similar. I’m a big believer of keeping my word to my kids, so they know not to trivalise words.

For example, if a promise was made to buy them ice-cream, but they misbehaved. We will still go for ice-cream, but they don’t get to choose the flavours, or they wont get to order what they want. I get to keep my word, they get to still learn the consequence of misbehaving. But if the misbehaviour is real out of hand, we’ll postpone the ice-cream. They will still get their ice-cream, just not that day.

I can imagine many parents who shudder at what we do, and many who may agree. At the end, it’s always for the best of our kids, in the best possible way we know how. Tiger Mum or not, it’s for them kids, not for us, ya?

 

 

 

 

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Kids judges–For food, what else?

When we go to the food court or market, our kids will have a few standard favourites – Fishball noodles, Spaghetti, Japanese Bento Set (that’s Nicole, don’t ask me how she acquired this expensive taste bud!) and of course Chicken Rice!

We love chicken rice. I mean, our entire family, even our helper, we love it!

Recently, we participated in a Makan King competition to choose the Best Chicken Rice in town! Oooh competition was very keen, there were lots of experts everywhere. Below are the most serious experts at work—mind you, they give their comments freely and don’t mince their words! You hear “My favourite is Stall 6” “My favourite is better than yours!” (photo credit: Moses Chng)

So the race was between Stall #6 and Stall #7. The people’s choice (and Nathan’s) was Tian Tian Chicken Rice from Joo Chiat (Maxwell market was closed for renovation). Sigh… not my choice though..

What would be your favourite Chicken Rice Stall?

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Therapy 101-Thankful for Therapy

Every Thursday, Nadine goes for her therapy session. It has come to a point where I look forward to Thursdays. It’s a Nadine day in that sense. She gets really stretched mentally while going through her sessions. Some days, she goes through simple his/her/it differentiation. Some days, it’s memory work of shapes and sizes. And some days it’s just 1 full hour of chatting. The range is wide, the work is hard.

That’s how it is for her. Hard work every Thursday.

For me? It used to be a day of kicking myself. When I see what the therapist does, and the activities they go through, I go “Why didn’t I pick that up about Nadine?” “Didn’t you notice she couldn’t do this?” “And look at that! Such an easy task, and you could have taught her!”

But I passed that. *phew* It was no point berating myself. It didn’t help me, and it didn’t help her. Guilt is not a part of therapy. It does hit you. I mean, which parent wouldn’t feel the entire responsibility of the child on his shoulder? I won’t even want to dwell on that, cos it depresses you, and it’s just going through cycles of “What ifs” and “I should haves”. This looking back mentality has gone on long enough.

Now Thursdays are a celebration days. We celebrate the new stuff Nadine can do, the achievements she has made and the milestones conquered. (Thursdays are also homework days. The therapist gives us—parents—work to do at home for the coming week) But it’s great joy.

I don’t focus on her being slower than her peers. I don’t sigh at how she has only mastered stage 2 when her friends can do stage 5 backwards. ohhhh but that doesn’t mean I’m not aware of the above. I am aware, and I have to be aware. Those are the yardsticks of society, those are necessary to measure her progress. But focus on them and push her to reach them? Nah…

I thank God daily for what Nadine has accomplished. And on Thursdays, I thank God a little more! I get to see in my untrained eyes (erm.. after 3 months, it’s a little more trained now), the little steps of progress. I stand amazed every Thursday at how God made us—that every tiniest little word/act plays a part in a person’s development. He’s really in control. There’s no doubt about it.

This is part of a series I’ve started – Therapy 101, to document Nadine’s developmental struggles and victories, and to journal my own learning experiences as she goes through hers.

And linking up with

 

 

Technorati Tags: children development,delay development,late bloomer,children therapy,kids therapy,kids speech delay,when to go therapist,early childhood development

Photographer taking photographer

We’re in KL for a short short getaway… will blog more about it when we’re back.

We just came back to the hotel and I’ve a perfect picture for today’s Photo *heart* Fridays!

Nicole our resident photographer did the professional thing to position her siblings. She got them to pose, tilt their head at a certain angle, and they definitely didn’t really listen to her!

She took the picture, and Daddy took one of her! Family shot I say! =)

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